Curio's Crazy Day
by clumsygirly
Summary: A Crack Story with a Morale. I really couldn't think of a tittle. This isn't my first story but it's my first publishing so enjoy : sugessted for anyone T and up whos had a bad day. And I did spell Mercutio the wrong way but Marcutio just feels better


Disclaimer: **I DO NOT OWN ROMEOXJULIET CHARACTERS!!!!!!** I making this because I came upon the realization I'm a BAMF at RomeoxJuliet crack stories. I'm also extremely bored so here goes the crack! Enjoy and review! : )

Warning! This has some adult lingo. Please don't read unless you have permission from a guardian (who ever did this first good idea :D) Kai is not responsible if you get in troublez.

It was a cold day in the new Neo Verona. So cold in fact that many people were walking around with oil heaters strapped upon their heads. And on this cold day the main character of this crack story Curio manned his veggie stand fiercely. So fiercely he had his large battle axe with him. Oh yeah there was no way the frost would get his veggies, not this time.

About this time the crazy Marcutio came around the corner. He fidgeted oddly like a person with a bad case of turrets. He needed his crazy pills and normally got them from Curio's stand along with anti-crazy pills because of course what crazy person always wants to be normal? He skipped down to the stand and laughed manically throwing his head back. Curio watched him a bit creeped out. Marcutio then threw his head into a box of potatoes.

"The usual Curio." Came his voice muffled by the starch.

"No can do crazy, I stopped getting those shipments of crazy pills. Too detrimental to the tomatoes." Curio shook his head firmly. "The juices in the tomatoes get all funky tasting when ever your pills are in stock."

Marcutio lifted his head out of the potatoes. "Those damned tomatoes!"

Curio lifted his axe menacingly "You got a problem with my merchandise?"

Marcutio jumped into the box of potatoes sending potatoes soaring about the street.

"Oh no! My starches!" Cried Curio and leapt to the cold street putting the fallen spuds into his apron.

Suddenly Lancelot came out of the ground. "Curio stop that's a health risk!"

Curio did a double take "The hell?! Doctor you were burned alive!"

Lancelot laughed in a vigilantly way, "Dear Curio where ever there is a violation of health I'll be there! When ever a little kid eats ice cream off the ground I'll be there! When ever a woman uses her hands to wipe off the snot of her baby I'll be there! When ever a man uses his teeth to rip open the plastic of a new CD I'll be there!!!!"

Curio blinked " Um…..what?"

Lancelot looked over at Marcutio in the potato box and narrowed his eyes "Hey you there! What do you think your doing?!"

Marcutio started rapping "I'm in a box m***********"

Lancelot coved his ears "Omg!!! Immoral lyrics!!!!!!" Lancelot shriveled up on to the cold street.

Curio shook his head at Lancelot and wandered back to his stand and put the spuds in a different box. "I thought things would be different….no more stress but this….." he picked up his axe and began to sharpen it in the back.

Willie skipped into the square accompanied by the taller Antonio in a sheep costume. Willie began spraying Mountain Dew around the street.

"Alright Antonio to act a sheep you must be a sheep." Willie smiled widely and began to spin about spraying even more off the highly caffeinated drink.

Antonio began to feel sick "Ummmm William can I just not be in your play?"

Willie stopped spinning abruptly he turned slowly toward the blossoming youth "Does the fact I own you mean nothing to you? You insolent brat!! Feel the wrath of William Shakespeare!!!" Willie pulled out a quil and paper. He wrote ferociously and then smiled "Ha now your character dies in the end!!"

Antonio grasped his hair in his hands "OH NO NOT THE LITTLE SNOW WHITE LAMB!!!!! You animal hater!!! Now Imma go form a group against animal cruelty and we'll hang you!!!" Cried Antonio and ran off.

Lancelot realized that Marcutio was now sleeping in the box of potatoes and sprang up. "Young Antonio what will you call this mystically group?!"

"People for the Ethical Endings for Animals in William Shakespeare Plays or PEEAWP." Antonio smiled and ran around the corner.

"God speed Antonio God speed." Lancelot murmured.

Tybalt then magically fell out of the sky. Luckily he landed on Hermione.

Tybalt looked down at the crushed Hermione "Thanks for being a fatty…..oh….your squished. I knew I shouldn't have had that last tea cake!"

Lancelot screamed "Omg!! You just dirtied that whole area!!!" and he whipped out his _Purell_ bottle. "Step aside! Hand sanitizer always kills 99.9% of germs!"

Tybalt blinked. "Um ok….", and moved off of the flattened corpse.

Lancelot looked at Hermione's body. "We can rebuild her stronger, faster, better looking. She'll be bionic woman!!!!"

Benvolio charged in on his magic broom of wonder and landed on top of Hermione's body and did a little jig on her face while singing "Ding dong the witch is dead." Then he flew off into the distance.

Marcutio landed in the prosecutor's desk. "HOLD IT! That's anti-logic!!!"

Willie appeared in the defense's desk. "OBJECTION! You can't say that because you're not Gerard Butler!"

Marcutio hit his head against the desk. "OBJECTION! Who's Gerard Butler?!"

Willie smiled knowing he had one the case. "GOTTCHA! Exactly!!"

Marcutio was about to have an awesome freak out when Curio broke into the court room with his large battle axe foaming at the mouth. "What's wrong with you people?!!!"

Willie leapt into Marcutio's arms in fright.

"Dude Curio what's up with you?" Marcutio blinked.

"No crazy! You shut up! I've been put in this story by mistake! I'm suppose to a cool character contrasted by my love for Juliet and the fact I screwed up trying to get her to love me!!!!" He raised the axe over his head in a fit of rage. "Today was the day my veggies would be safe from the frost but you crazy threw my starches into the street and so now they are ruined!!!" Curio's eye was twitching and he began to swing his axe around the court room.

Conrad appeared in the judge's seat. "Bailiff, arrest this Curio character!"

The bailiff stood up. It was none other then the bionical Hermione.

"What the heck kind of crap is this?!" Curio asked as the android shot missiles from her knee caps.

Curio succeeded in dodging all of them and turned pulling out a BAMF Gun Frontier pistol from his pocket and pointed it at his skull. "Remember kiddies don't take anti-crazy pills or you'll end up like meeeee!" He laughed and pulled the trigger sending water into his face.

And so in conclusion of this crack story….Francisco had to put Curio on house arrest and take away all his cool weapons. Marcutio finally got his crazy pills. Lancelot tried to take a shower and turned back to ashes. Tybalt used a seat belt while riding dragon steeds. Willie's animal death play was a success except for the PEEAWP holding three person riots after every show led by Antonio. Benvolio took some tap dancing lessons where he made the Caremell Dansen dance famous (jk). And Conrad realized his love for bionical android women. Oh and the veggies never made it….

Morale: Don't take other peoples prescription druggies :D

Authors note: So there ya go. If your confused about Gerard Butler he's an actor. I only

know one movie he's in off the top of my head and that's _P.S. I Love You._

He's super cute though! A crack story. I hope it made absolutely no since!

Give me some reviews and ideas. Thanks so much for reading!!!

A crack writer,

Kai


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